Become a Social Butterfly and Learn to Meet New People

A diverse group of friends, in their forties, with various ethnicities and tattoos, gather around a table for dinner. They enthusiastically join hands in a high-five, blurred faces and focus on hands

Key Points

  • Meeting new people is a beautiful yet challenging aspect of adulthood that everyone encounters.

  • Figure out how to meet new people to build the social circle of your dreams, even if you're more introverted.

  • Meet new friends during your favorite activities, join clubs, start conversations with strangers, and utilize apps. 

  • Once you know how to meet new people, put yourself out there and get to know them deeply, initiate plans, and build your connection.

Friendship is a beautiful part of life — two strangers agree to share their lives in a platonic and loving way. Yet, making friends is difficult. Friendships increase your sense of importance and belonging, reduce stress, increase happiness, and benefit romantic relationships. Learning how to meet new people is not only an important life skill but necessary for a fulfilling and happy life.

Putting yourself out there and seeking friendship is scary but rewarding. The best ways to meet new people are to remain open to the idea of friendship, actively try to get to know people, join clubs, pursue hobbies, and swipe through a friend-finding app.

Figure out what works best for you when it comes to finding friends in the 21st century and start fostering new friendships.

Be Open

The first step to making new friends is opening up to new people and putting yourself out there. When you are invited out for drinks with coworkers, to a neighborhood gathering, or to a friend’s birthday — get up and go!

To meet new people, you have to participate in activities around others as much as possible. Don’t sacrifice your self-care time, but don’t hibernate on your couch after work every day.

Be open to chatting with people at the store, gym, or office water cooler. Put yourself out there to meet new people and see if you hit it off. This is especially difficult if you are shy or introverted. Work on this little by little, or utilize this advice if you’re a shy girl trying to break out of her shell.

Do your best to communicate cheerfully with people to make a good impression. Emotions are contagious, so people are happy to absorb your positive energy and want to spend more time with you. 

Assuming people enjoy your personality is useful to raise your confidence in blossoming relationships and helps you maintain a positive attitude. According to platonic love expert Dr. Marisa Franco, “The more you assume people like you, the friendlier you’ll be, and the more they actually will. And I promise you won’t be deluded by assuming this. According to research […] when strangers interacted, they later underestimated how liked they are by one another […] So assuming people like you might bring you closer to the truth.”

Learn About Them

A valuable way to get to know someone is to ask them questions. When you meet someone new and want to build a friendship, inquire about their lives and listen to what they say. Find out where they grew up, if they enjoy their job, how many siblings they have, their favorite sport, and what music they like. 

Asking someone questions about themselves shows that you’re genuinely interested in getting to know them and building a connection. This brings to light the commonalities between you two and creates the initial roots of your bond. 

Tell a Secret

Break the ice with something juicier than small talk and progress your casual relationship to a true friendship. Sharing secrets with someone is a valuable tactic to make you feel closer to one another. Showing vulnerability to another creates intimacy in the relationship, even if it is a seemingly minor secret. 

Careful not to come on too strong by dumping trauma or exposing an incriminating mistake you made, but try sharing the identity of your secret crush or the surprise you’re planning for your mom’s birthday.

Keep it light and fun, but meaningful!

Deepen Existing Friendships

You likely have many acquaintances and casual friendships that linger shallowly. Don’t overlook these existing friendships, but rather work to deepen them. 

Invite someone you don’t know well but enjoy seeing out for coffee, drinks, the movies, or a walk in the park. Initiating plans with people you know is the best way to make new friends. Encourage the people you invite to bring their other friends to expand your social circle even further. 

Through Hobbies

People are most attracted to those they share commonalities with. Lean into your hobbies to find friends that share your same interests.

Take a Class

Find a local class for your passion, even if you don’t need a class. Incorporating a class into your routine brings regular socialization into your schedule and allows you to converse with new people.

If you do not have an existing hobby, take a class to start a new hobby. Introduce yourself to people in the class, as you’re guaranteed to see them regularly. Get to know a little bit about people, forecast who you are most likely to hit it off with, and then ask them to meet outside of class.

Join a Club

Look up local clubs for boxing, reading, knitting, gardening, or any hobby you enjoy. Attend the club meetings and put on your best-smiling face to leave a good impression on the other attendees. Ask a group of people or someone you vibe with to get lunch after the meeting or exchange contacts to make plans later in the week. 

Join online clubs and Facebook groups to interact with people that share your passions. Post on the page to introduce yourself, say what area you reside in, and see if anyone is interested in meeting up face-to-face to share the love of your hobby.

Start attending a yoga class every week at your local yoga studio and introduce yourself to fellow yogis after class. Roll your mat next to someone you see a potential friendship with, and bring essential oils to share. 

Find a local coworking group and take a remote day from your job. Meet at the local coffee shop, converse with other online workers, network for business, make each other laugh, and enjoy the day getting to know strangers.

Head to your local library or bookstore to join a book club. You’ll find people who share your passion for reading; there’s always something to discuss as you indulge in the same story. 

There are endless types of clubs to join, guaranteeing an option for anyone’s interests. If there aren’t ample options in your area, find an online club to join or start your own club to make friends while participating in your favorite activities!

Volunteer

Find a local animal shelter, environmental club, or other social cause you care about, and lend your time while socializing with other selfless volunteers. Working for a good cause is an amazing opportunity to bond with others. Participating in difficult volunteer work encourages people to let their guard down and show their vulnerable side.

Ask thoughtful questions during your volunteer work to get to know each other better, invite them out for lunch, or bring donuts in the morning to catch their attention. Meeting people while doing volunteer work guarantees new friends that share your values. 

Ask

Sitting at home waiting for others to initiate plans with you is a recipe for disaster. It feels nice to receive an invitation from others, so put a smile on someone’s face with an invitation. Be brave and ask a potential friend out for coffee, shopping, or to your favorite pottery class over the weekend. 

Rather than hiding in your apartment with takeout after work, eat at the restaurant and invite another solo eater to share your table. Your potential best friend could be a fellow regular at your favorite pizza joint!

When waiting in line at the grocery store, ask the person in front of you what they are cooking for dinner. Make small talk with local people to hit it off with a simple introduction.

Social Media

Making friends on social media is the new, hot trend. There are communities on TikTok, Reddit, Facebook, and other social media sites for any niche category imaginable. Chat with people you connect with, message someone that shares your common interests, and join groups of your favorite hobbies. 

Follow creators from your niche interests on TikTok and start participating in conversations in the comments. Reply to comments, start debates, and friend the familiar names you see across videos. You’re sure to make some online friends, and if you're lucky, some local ones to meet in real life too. 

Use Apps

Just like dating apps, there are apps to find friends. Create a profile showcasing your personality, hobbies, and interests that potential friends want to see. Choose photos that show what you look like and what you like to do. Then, write a bio highlighting what you are looking for and what you enjoy doing with friends. 

Usually, when swiping, you decide if you like someone or not based on how hot they are in their photos. Dating apps focus on the images in profiles, but when making friends, looks are unimportant. Try to read bios and swipe for profiles of people you’ll get along with rather than how cute they are in their photos.

Start swiping, and find your future best friend!

Bumble BFF

Bumble is one of the most popular dating apps known for making females message first. After seeing the app effectively used to make friends, Bumble’s team rolled out a feature to look specifically for friends on their site. Go into your settings and change from dating to “BFF” to start swiping for platonic friendships. If you have a dating account, use the same profile, but gear it towards friendships if you sport spicy content there.

There is also a business option on Bumble if you wish to meet people for networking purposes. Make your profile more professional for this setting, though.

Your profile can feature up to six videos, three profile prompts, and a bio to tell users about yourself. There are also options to include features of your life such as education, work style, living abroad, being new in the city, family life, religion, and LGBTQIA+ pride. 

Include up to five hobbies from their extensive list, including photography, writing, wine, coffee, fitness, music, sports, spirituality, and social activism. This feature makes it easier to showcase your hobbies without a lengthy bio and allows the algorithm to find your matches. It is free to use all of the necessary features on Bumble to find friends, but there are options to upgrade if you wish.

Start swiping to find like-minded people in your area. If you both like each other on the app, you’ll match, and either one has the opportunity to start a conversation. You both must message within 24 hours of matching, or the match expires.

If you hit it off on the app, ask your new BFF for their number or Instagram to converse on a third-party platform and make some weekend plans. 

Meetup

Meetup is the perfect friendship app for socially awkward people who want to meet in a group setting. This app focuses on bringing groups together for workshops and group activities in real life based on the hobbies they partake in.

Join a group of people that you share a common interest rather than swiping on individual profiles. There are far more people to talk to, and there’s already a subject matter to discuss — the workshop or hobby you are practicing. 

Meetup has been helping people find communities for over 20 years. Use the app to search for various activities and groups in your city or a city you are visiting, and sign up to attend events. It is free to use, but some events may incur a cost to attend.

Hey! VINA

Hey! VINA is an app made by women for women to foster female friendships. This app focuses on female empowerment and bringing independent women together.

The algorithm matches women based on passions and lifestyle to find people you enjoy. There are quizzes and articles to help you grow into the best version of yourself while finding other women to share the journey with.

Discover your fun and supportive girl gang on Hey! VINA and plan a real-life meet-up using the planning tool built into the app for solo meets or groups.

Wink

Wink is a dating-app style friend finder app that shows potential local friends based on common interests. You only see people who share one or more of your interests. If you match with someone, switch directly to Snapchat and get to know each other better.

Wink helps you find new friends on Snapchat without utilizing location, but some users share their location in their bio to find locals. Most users on the app are teenagers, but there are people of all ages.

If you like using Snapchat and want friends to chat with online to pass the time, try Wink to foster casual new friendships. 

Atleto

Atleto is an app intended to bring sports lovers together. Whether you are looking for a gym buddy, tennis partner, or new friends to start a pick-up basketball game, download Atleto to find your people. 

This app brings athletes together for friendship, sports, and group fitness activities. Join groups and sign up for events or search through individual profiles to socialize on a smaller basis.

If you love an active lifestyle and want to make friends with the same passion, try Atleto to meet your type of people. 

PawDate

You'll love meeting other dog owners if your doggo is already your best friend. PawDate is an app designed to find friends for your dog and, hopefully, their owners. Find locals to meet at the dog park, go on a walk, or meet for any doggie play date you desire.

Meeting fellow dog owners guarantees something in common and provides a cute activity to break the ice when you meet. Going on a double friend date with another power-dog-and-owner duo is amazing!

Twitch

Twitch is a streaming service for niche communities of hobbies and other interests. There’s an opportunity for anime lovers, make-up artists, sex workers, and fan-fiction writers to find a community of people that share their interests and mingle. 

Twitch mainly provides opportunities to make online friendships, but there is potential to find people in your area to meet too. Enjoy live streams and geeking out on your favorite interests with cool people.

After finding someone in your category that you hit it off with, Twitch has a messaging feature for private conversations and deeper connections. This app is perfect for introverts and specific fandoms!

Skout

Skout is another friend finder app built like a classic dating app. There are over a million users in more than 100 countries, so many options exist to meet people. There is a feature to choose the location of your search, so it is the perfect app for someone moving or for travelers. Find friends from anywhere in the world and start getting to know each other!

Yubo

Yubo is a live-streaming app for introverts to connect with people in chat rooms. If you prefer to socialize from the comfort of your own home over the internet, Yubo is perfect for you. 

Start a live stream about your favorite debatable topic, video game, or book, or talk about your day. Up to ten people can join a live stream to ensure the conversation stays interesting but not overcrowded. 

Yubo doesn’t utilize location, so real-life meet-ups are unlikely, but it’s exciting to chat with people from anywhere in the world. 

This app takes safety precautions very seriously and kicks users out if they don’t follow the community guidelines. This puts you at ease when talking to strangers on the internet.

Swipe, stream, and chat with people from anywhere in the world to make new friends from your phone on Yubo. 

Tinder

Tinder is the most used dating app in the world, with so many people to swipe through. Tinder is infamous as an app used to find hook-ups, so clarify in your bio that you are there looking for friends.

Most friend-finding apps aren’t very popular in rural areas, but Tinder users arise from the most unlikely places. If you aren’t finding friendship apps in your location, try Tinder for more options and maintain patience despite the thirsty profiles.

Taimi

Taimi is an LGBTQIA+ app for finding dates or friends. If you are a proud member of the queer community, look for friends across the rainbow spectrum. With over 11 million users, you are sure to find plenty of people within the community.

The app is designed like a social media platform to create posts and stories or video chat, host live streams, and much more. It is free to download, make a profile, match with people, and start chatting. Taimi matches you with people based on your location and interests. 

As a member of the LGBTQIA+ community, it’s amazing to make friends within the community. Make a profile and let people know you are looking for friends. Match with people you think you’ll hit it off with and start connecting with your new, colorful best friends.

Get Out There

It’s challenging to meet new people — especially as adults — but so fulfilling when you do. Friends satisfy the desire to socialize, provide support in times of need, and make each other laugh until their stomachs hurt. 

To meet new friends, stay open to people you already know, invite acquaintances for coffee, participate in local events, and download an app to find your people.

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