How To Tell Someone You Like Them

man and woman standing next to each other smiling

True love is supposed to be simple. We learned from a young age that you’d meet someone you like, start dating, and then ride off into the sunset for your happily ever after. Unfortunately, the reality is more complicated, and you’ll never get your happily ever after if you don’t open your mouth and tell your crush you like them.

Online dating has taken off some of the pressure of romantic love. You are attracted to a person when you swipe on each other, but you may be wondering how to tell someone you like them. Maybe it’s been a while since you’ve been on the market, or you’re not used to making the first move. Whatever your motivation, here are some sure-fire tips covering how to tell someone you like them.

How to Tell Someone You Like Them?

You can tell someone you like them with your words and actions in person, over the phone, via text, or any other way you communicate. Each method has its pros and cons, so you’ll want to take those into account when considering how to tell someone you like them. For example, texting leaves room for misinterpretation, while in-person calls for a level of confidence that you may not be feeling at the moment.

How to tell someone you like them depends on you and your comfort level. You may be direct, drop hints, flirt, or try to get them to make the first move. When you are thinking about how to tell someone you like them, consider your existing relationship and see if you can tailor your actions to them and their comfort level. It’s all about the little things. Prepare for the possibility that they may not return your romantic feeling.

You will never know what can happen unless you try, so think long and hard about how to tell someone you like them. Otherwise, you’ll be left wondering what could have been if you had just taken a risk. What’s the worst that could happen? You aren’t with the person now, and you’re happy – or at the very least, content. If they say no, you move on and find someone else worthy of your time, love, and affection.

man and woman looking at each other

Decide How to Tell Someone You Like Them

Now that you’ve set your mind on sharing your feelings, you have to decide how to tell someone you like them. Do you want to talk to them in person? Over text? Over the phone? Each method has pros and cons you’ll want to consider before choosing how to tell someone you like them. The more comfortable you are from the start, the more confident you’ll feel.


If you’re feeling up to it, in person is the best way to tell someone you’re into them. You can see the complete picture – their reaction, eye contact, facial expressions, and body language. There’s no time for them to think and consider their response.

When you’re considering how to tell someone you like them in person, pick a location or a common interest that you both feel comfortable. Please don’t make it a public declaration. It’s not fair to put that pressure on them. After all, you’ve had the time to process your feelings and consider how to tell someone you like them. The person you are into has not had the luxury of time.

While in-person is the ideal way to share your feelings, it’s also the hardest. It would be best if you were more confident because you can’t hide behind a screen. The potential for embarrassment is higher, especially if they don’t return your feelings. Consider how to tell someone you like them and what that means for you if they say yes or no. Think about the different scenarios but have fun with it. Don’t rehearse.

woman looking at her crush

Via Text

Texting is one of the most popular forms of communication, so if you are thinking about how to tell someone you like them, it may take some of the pressure off. You can shoot off a text, use some flirty emojis, and that’s it. You don’t have to wait until you see your crush in person to tell them how you feel.

Texting introduces different issues. You run the risk of being ghosted by your crush. You’ve told them you like them, and suddenly there are crickets. Now your anxiety is heightened, and you’re running through all the reasons you were a fool to tell them how you feel. The shame and embarrassment are building with each thought.

It’s so easy to catastrophize with every second that passes but know that not everyone can answer your texts the moment you send them. They have other priorities that can keep them from their phone, so if you don’t hear back right away, that’s not always the kiss of death. Be patient and give them the space they need to respond. You’ve been thinking how to tell someone you like them, and they are considering how to respond.

Texting also leaves room for misunderstanding. Maybe you’ve spent weeks thinking about how to tell someone you like them, and you’ve come up with the perfect, witty pickup line. It made so much sense. You thought it was the ideal line, and you nailed it. However, it doesn’t go well when your crush reads the words. They thought you were joking around or didn’t understand what you were trying to do. Worse, they could be offended!

Texting leaves a lot of room for interpretation and misinterpretation, so if you are thinking about how to tell someone you like them over text, make sure you consider all the angles to get the point across. It’s not impossible to share your feelings over text. After all, it’s how most of us communicate. Be clear and you will learn how to tell someone you like them to get the results you want.

man and woman having coffee

Over the Phone

A happy medium between in person and via text is communicating over the phone. Many people shy away from talking on the phone but don’t rule it out as an option when considering how to tell someone you like them. You won’t see their reaction, but you can hear it in real-time.

Pay close attention to their voice and breathing. Did it hitch when you shared how you felt? Did their voice get higher? Did they clear their throat? Use delaying tactics? All of these things can tell you how your crush feels. You can observe them in real-time, helping you prepare for the best or worst-case scenario.

Unlike telling someone your feelings in person, you can hang up the phone if it doesn’t go your way. It’s still awkward, but you have an easier out. How to tell someone you like them is hard enough. You shouldn’t have to worry about being embarrassed for your vulnerability if they don’t return your feelings.

Best Practices on How to Tell Someone You Like Them

Now that you’ve picked how to tell someone you like them, you’ll need to go through with it! Take a deep breath and go for it. You’ll always wonder what could have been if you don’t, and knowing the outcome is always better than living with the what-ifs.

Understand Your Feelings

Before you tell someone you like them, you need to understand how you feel. Why do you like that person? Dig deep because if you’re putting yourself out there, you want to ensure you’re doing it for the right reasons. Do you think they’re attractive? Do you have shared interests or a similar sense of humor?

Understanding why you feel the way you do can help you identify how to tell someone you like them for a chance at better success. For example, if you both really like Italian food, you can ask them if they would like to get pasta with you. If they want the activity, they are more likely to say yes. They’ll appreciate the time you’ve taken to learn their interests, and it will start you off on the right foot.

How to tell someone you like them should be different each time because we’re all different. If you are closer to the person, you can be more personalized. You don’t need to get too specific if you’ve just met them. It could come off as off-putting.

man and woman standing back to back

Pick Your Moment.

Timing is everything, so you’ll want to pick your moment. Maybe you’re having a great conversation with friends, and you want to shoot your shot when you find yourself alone with your crush. Again, you don’t want to ask them in public to put them on the spot, so you’ll want to choose the right moment when thinking about how to tell someone you like them.

The perfect moment does not exist. You can choose your timing, but that does not permit you to wait forever. If you wait too long, it’s more likely the person will move on. When you consider when and how to tell someone you like them, make sure they are single and open to dating.

The right time can make or break your success. It’s not about you finally deciding that you’re ready to share your feelings. It’s about understanding how to tell someone you like them on their time.

Stay Calm

Please don’t make a big deal out of it. You’ll likely be very nervous, no matter how many times you’ve considered how to tell someone you like them. That’s normal. Your crush may even find that endearing! As hard as it may be, try to stay as calm as possible. If not, you may start to ramble, and your crush won’t know what you’re trying to say.

Now, that doesn’t mean that you need to play it cool. If you’re too detached, you may seem disinterested, giving you the opposite effect. It’s a delicate balance, but if you are authentic to yourself, you can find how to tell someone you like them in a way that works for you.

Be Direct

It can be tempting to beat around the bush, but you’ll get the best results if you are direct. If you want to go out with someone, ask them out on a date. Leave no room for confusion or interpretation. Some people aren’t great at reading signals and body language, so the more direct you can be, the better.

Don’t mistake being direct with being rude. On the contrary, if you are clear with your intentions, you will set firm boundaries from day one. You want your words and actions to align with your values when considering how to tell someone you like them.

man and woman laying in the grass while looking at each other

Confidence is Key

Don’t let nerves get the best of you. If you don’t feel confident, you want to fake it until you make it! Don’t be arrogant. Again, you want to be respectful when considering how to tell someone you like them. Be confident in your ask. You bring a lot to the table, and anyone would be lucky to be a part of your life.

Anxiety is natural. When planning how to tell someone you like them, don’t let the butterflies in your stomach hold you back. Instead, they can propel you forward. You’ll only get rid of them by acting.

Talk It Out with Friends

Your friends can be a great sounding board when thinking about how to tell someone you like them. Practice what you’d like to say to them. Get feedback on your delivery. You don’t want to sound too rehearsed, but you can adjust your delivery based on the opinions of a close friend.

You can also consult with a mutual friend. Depending on the situation, they can also serve as your wing-woman or wingman, boosting your confidence before sharing your feelings. How to tell someone you like them is unique to you. It’s a vulnerable moment, and your friends can help hype you up so you’ll feel ready to take on the world.

Don’t Go Overboard

Unloading your feelings can be overwhelming, and don’t blurt them all out at once. Don’t tell someone you love them unprovoked. Remember, you’ve had time to process your feelings. The person you’re telling has not. You’ve been considering how to tell someone you like them for a while, so it can be easy to go overboard. You want to get it all out and put your cards on the table.

While you may have the best of intentions, it can be intimidating and may cause your crush to run away instead of seeking a romantic relationship. Resist the urge and keep your cool. Once you’re more established, you can share the depths of your feelings, but don’t be that person from day one.

man and woman hugging and smiling

Set a Deadline and Stick to It

You can put off how to tell someone you like them indefinitely, so it’s essential to set a deadline and stick to it. Setting a deadline will keep you accountable. Write it down. Put a reminder on your phone. Set the deadline in a way that makes sense to you.

If you don’t meet it, move on. You can’t keep waiting to share your feelings forever. It’s not fair to your crush or you to live in limbo for so long, so either figure out how to tell someone you like them or let them go. Now may not be the right time, and that’s okay.

What Happens If They Don’t Return Your Feelings?

Your worst nightmare came true. You put yourself out there, and your crush said no. What now?

It’s hard, and you’re feeling many feelings right now – shame, embarrassment, sadness, and maybe even anger. Those feelings are only temporary. They will fade in time.

No matter the result, take time to celebrate that you took a chance. You put yourself out there, and maybe next time, you’ll have a different outcome and find a romantic partner. Each time you share your feelings, it gets easier for next time.

Consider where you were before you told your crush your true feelings. How long had you been single? Were you happy? What changed the moment they turned you down? The only thing that changed is that your crush’s feelings are no longer an unknown variable. Nothing else has changed. Once you put that into perspective, it makes it much easier to deal with your feelings of rejection.

If you’re close to your crush, ask them why after some time has passed. Reflect on your approach and see if there’s anything you could have done differently. Spend time working on yourself. Once you feel comfortable with yourself, you’ll feel comfortable with other people.

How to tell someone you like them isn’t about saying the perfect thing to get the best result. It’s about being authentically you. You’re looking for a partner to compliment you, flaws and all. You’ll find someone, but in the meantime, keep practicing how to tell someone you like them. It will pay off in the end!

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