Key Points
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People consider height an essential characteristic for potential partners, creating a height bias when using dating apps.
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Most people prefer men whose height is over 5'8" and women whose height is under 5'9".
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Dating as a tall woman is often easier than dating as a short man, and there are benefits to dating as a tall woman.
According to dating apps, the key criteria of potential partners are age, location, and height. They're the characteristics that people see as core components of online dating, so they must be visible on your profile. Scoping out a potential date's age and location make sense because you want to meet up with someone in your area, and it's great to match with someone who shares your maturity level.
Why do dating app users consider height an essential characteristic of a partner? It has nothing to do with their personality, how they'll treat you, or what type of partner they'll be in a relationship. Read on to discover research-backed insights into how height bias influences your matches — whether you're a tall woman dating or a shortie looking for your bodacious Brooke Shields.
Key Aspects of Potential Partners
Most people consider communication, loyalty, kindness, compassion, trust, emotional vulnerability, and the willingness to forgive as some of the most important aspects of a relationship. However, none of these pillars of a successful relationship have anything to do with a person's height. In reality, when you're dating someone for a long time, you realize that height is not their most important characteristic or even what you love most about them.
However, the truth remains: People do consider a person's height important, and a match's height is a factor someone takes into consideration before dating them. People swipe left — even if the match's other characteristics seem great — if their height does not align with their preference.
Before you swipe left, think about these deep dives: Why is height so important when it comes to dating? Why does height affect whom you date? How are some people, especially tall women and short men, at a potential disadvantage when dating because of their height?
Why Height Is So Important in Relationships
While height does not have much to do with who a person is at their core, it does have significance in dating. Many people feel they need to be physically attracted to the person they're dating, and height can factor into how someone finds another person attractive.
According to one survey of people on dating apps, 45 percent of the women preferred men who were over 6 feet tall, and 25 percent of the women preferred men who were between 5'8" to 6 feet. The survey found that only 2 percent of the women surveyed preferred men who are under 5'8". Regarding the men surveyed, 35 percent preferred women approximately 5'6", and 20 percent preferred women whose height was between 5'4" to 5'6". The survey found that only 3 percent of men preferred women who are over 5'9".
This shows there is a height bias putting tall women and short men at a disadvantage because the majority of people don't prefer men who are under 5'8" or women who are over 5'9". For this article, "tall women" refers to women over 5'9", and "short men" refers to men under 5'8."
Importance of Height on Dating Apps
While height is a characteristic people look for in a potential dating partner, it's especially prominent on dating apps. Men are more likely to get likes and matches if they are over 6 feet, and women are more likely to get likes and matches if their height is between 5'3" and 5'6".
This means taller women are less likely to get likes and matches than women who are 5'3" to 5'6". The dating app Badoo states that the most-swiped height for women on dating apps is 5'5", and the second most-swiped height for women is 5'3". A height bias for men is also evident on dating apps: Men are less likely to get likes and messages if their height is less than 6 feet. If a man is 6'3" or 6'4", his chances of receiving likes and messages are even higher.
Seeing how people find a potential partner's height so essential, you can even use height filters on some dating apps to filter out the people based on your height preferences. This means that based on preferences, tall women's and short men's profiles aren't visible to those who use these filters.
When short men and tall women constantly deal with the reality of getting fewer likes and matches because of their height, some choose to lie about their height on their dating profiles. Men add an inch or a few, and women subtract. However, if things go well, you inevitably have to meet for a date, in which case, your height is transparent. This happens so often that the term "height-fishing" emerged, meaning someone is lying about their true height.
Challenges for Tall Women Dating
Being a tall woman means having some challenges when it comes to dating. As stated above, men prefer women between 5'4" and 5'6", so they are less likely to date tall women, especially those over 5'9". For some men, this may just be a preference based on what they find physically attractive, but for other men, this may be because they don’t want to date someone taller than them.
Two Texas sociologists, George Yancey and Michael O. Emerson, published a 2014 data study on dating height preferences and concluded that "among men, only 1.3 percent want to only date women taller than them whereas 13.5 percent want to only date women shorter than them." This height bias means that tall women have a smaller dating pool of men because most men feel they need to be taller than their partners. Since the average man is 5'9", tall women have a smaller selection because there aren't as many men in the world taller than them.
There is also another level of complexity to this for tall women. The article states, "But among women, 1.7 percent wanted to only date men shorter than them whereas 48.9 percent wanted to only date men taller than them." Not only are they faced with the challenges of being too tall for some men, but they also face the challenge of not wanting to date someone shorter than them.
Benefits of Dating as a Tall Woman
It's not all bad news for tall women dating. Some men prefer to date tall women. Better yet, some men don't even consider height when dating and don't care if a woman is taller than them. In fact, tall women have an easier time dating than short men.
That Texas study states that 48.9 percent of women want to date men taller than them compared to only 13.5 percent of men who want to date women shorter than them. A partner's height is much more of a factor for women than men regarding their potential partners. Women care more about dating taller men than men care about dating shorter women.
A 2007 study about height in relationships found that 23 percent of men and 4 percent of women would accept a relationship where the woman was taller. According to Yancey and Emerson's 2014 study, this is because short men are essentially seen as less attractive, less successful, and less masculine, whereas tall women don't face the same scrutiny for their height. Some even perceive short men as having a complex — the "Napoleon complex." This complex means a man feels inferior and less confident because of his shorter stature. Tall women are not said to have a complex because of their height.
Height matters for women seeking a date more than men. Dating as a tall woman may not be that hard because men do not make assumptions about a women's success or personality based on her height. As stated, men are more likely to date tall women. However, they may not be so quick to find a woman who would date them if they're shorter than her. So, when it comes to dating based on height, the main disadvantage tall women have is that they may have to overcome their bias when dating a shorter man.
Benefits of Dating a Tall Woman
There are many benefits of dating a tall woman. Some potential lovers find tall women more attractive, equating being tall with a model's height. Tall women usually get their height from having long legs, which is desirable to many people. Those extra few inches not only offer legs for days but also opportunities for better alignment during sex. Whereas a petite woman may need to grab heels for certain positions, your tall gal is a natural fit.
Many men may benefit from dating a tall woman because it shows he's not caught up on looking "manly." Some men may feel inferior or like less of a man because they're dating a taller woman or a woman close to their height. However, if you are dating a woman who is your height, almost your height, or taller than you, it shows you're confident in your masculinity.
On a romantic level, dating a tall woman allows you to perfectly hold hands with one another because there is likely not a considerable height difference.
So, if all these benefits make you interested in dating a tall woman and you're wondering where to meet taller women, try sporting leagues and teams. There are no dating apps for tall singles, but plenty of sports, such as volleyball and basketball, benefit from having tall players on their teams. If you enjoy playing sports, consider joining a co-ed sports league or team.
Additionally, since most modern dating takes place on dating apps, you can use the filters in unexpected ways. Use the height filter to see profiles for women who are above a certain height. Plenty of men do this to ensure they don't see profiles for women taller than they are, so you can certainly set your height preferences to ensure the opposite.
Tips for Dating a Tall Woman
If you're looking to date a tall woman, then there are certain guidelines you can follow to not make height a big deal and to attract a tall girl.
First, make sure you're confident in your height: Don't make jokes about the height difference or her height. This shows you may be a bit insecure about your height difference. Confident men attract most women, so by not making height jokes, you'll show her you're confident in yourself and your height. Plus, if you're shorter than her and she's not extremely interested in dating someone shorter than her, then showing your confidence may make her more attracted to you.
Second, make sure you compliment her on her height. Don't just focus on not making her height a big deal. Show her you don't just accept her height but like her height and how unique it makes her.
Third, don't wear platform shoes to sneakily try to make yourself taller. If she notices, then she may think you're insecure about the height difference, which might even make her self-conscious of her height. As her partner, you want to make her feel her most confident.
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