Being in an ENFJ INFP Relationship

Couple on the couch with dog

Of the 16 Meyers-Briggs personality types, an ENFJ INFP relationship is often regarded as the most compatible romantically. There are several factors that play into this, but it mostly stems from differing, yet complementary qualities between the two types. Why does an ENFJ INFP relationship have a better chance of working out? In an ENFJ INFP relationship, both types share some mutual characteristics such as care for people and a desire for excellence, but the means in which the two types go about these actions can vary – which is a good thing. They say opposites attract, which may be true in physics but in an INFP and ENFP relationship it can apply for introverted vs extroverted tendencies, or judging vs perceiving impulses.  Before jumping straight into why ENFJ INFP relationships work so well, it’s important to know what the Meyers-Briggs test is, what the connotations are of the two personality types, and what you should know before starting an ENFJ INFP relationshipBelow view of happy couple communicating during a meal at dining table. Of course, people are complex and contain multitudes. But on the flip side, people love to save mental space and compartmentalize as much as possible. While diminishing people into 16 small categories from a quick online test isn’t the best marker for understanding the complexities of the human mind, it is a great way to get a general understanding of some tendencies a person may have and how they may act in an ENFJ INFP relationship. Every characteristic does not exist in all people who identify with a particular category, but it’s a decent way to get a bird’s eye view on how people view the world around them. Many experts don’t even prescribe to referring to it as the 16 “personality types”, but consider it more of a mode of how people take in information and interact with their ENFJ INFP relationship. While there may be discrepancies in how experts feel the test should be classified, most do agree that the results are “valid and reliable” and can be easily applied by sifting through the nuances of ENFJ INFP relationships. People love to see patterns, and even though each person has a unique experience and perspective, people do often act in particular patterns, and some of those actions may be foreshadowed by what four letters are bestowed from the results of the exam. The 16 types are broken down into four categories – favorite world, information, decisions, and structure. In an ENFJ INFP relationship, the pair both share the middle two letters, which may play a part in the compatibility between them. Do you know your Meyers Briggs personality type? Let’s take a moment to gain a little understanding as to what these four classifications tell about a person and their context to an ENFJ INFP relationship. 

Favorite world

Favorite world describes whether you tend to focus on your personal inner world, or the outer world at large. This is the section where you are either labeled as Introverted (I) or Extroverted (E). There are connotations floating around both of those words, some of which are more valid than others. Regardless of your bias towards those words, in a Meyers Briggs test it’s purely to showcase how you typically unconsciously recharge. In an ENFJ INFP relationship, ENFJ’s are extroverted and INFP’s are introverted. While these are opposites, it doesn’t mean that an ENFJ INFP relationship is incompatible. As we’ll see later on, this actually typically works in the favor of an ENFJ INFP relationship. 

Information

This portion deals with whether a person tends to take in information at face value or if they intrinsically add meaning to the information as it's being received. These tendencies are labeled as Sensing (S) or Intuition (N). Whichever side you personally land on for this section, it is often difficult to understand how the other half of people take in information the opposite way – it’s just too foreign to grasp. The more you study the Meyers-Briggs system, the more you are able to comprehend this on a theoretical level, but because most people are so ingrained in their methods, they can never truly wrap their heads around the concept entirely. Luckily, in an INFP and ENJP relationship, the each member of the pair knows exactly how the other takes in information. In an ENFJ INFP relationship, our two lovebirds both share the Intuition label. In an INFP and ENFP relationship, each person knows right where the other person is coming from, giving a sense of warm empathy. 

Decisions

In this category, we look into the decision making process of each person in an ENFJ INFP relationship. Does the person typically look for consistencies and use logic in their decision making? Or do they incorporate the special circumstances and use their feelings a bit more? This is referred to as Thinking (T) vs Feeling (F). In ENFJ INFP relationships, both people use both logic and feelings in making decisions throughout their lives, but we’re focused on the subconscious decision-making habits people typically employ. In an ENFJ INFP relationship, both participants are feelers, providing some mutual ground to understand one another when making big decisions. Dating can often bring on substantial decisions that need to be made, so both people in an INFP ENFP relationship sharing the Feeling label can ease that process when it comes to the nitty gritty. 

Structure

The last category is based on how people prefer to structure their lives. Do they prefer a more structured (Judging, J) or a flexible (Perceiving, P) lifestyle? As we can see in our two types in an ENFJ INFP relationship, ENFJ’s are judgers, and INFP’s are perceivers. Everyone needs a little yin to their yang. Too structured of a life can cause mental health problems or at the very least boredom, while too flexible of a lifestyle can lead to chaos and unwanted problems in and ENFJ INFP relationship. Everyone needs someone to balance them out from time to time in an INFP and ENFP relationship. If managed poorly, this juxtaposition between the two types can be cause for upheaval in the INFP and ENFP relationship. However, if conducted in a healthy manner in ENFJ INFP relationships, this can be of great benefit to both parties.  Happy romantic couple dancing in kitchen while cooking

General Characteristics of ENFJ’s

The one word assigned to encapsulate the essence of ENFJ’s is the “protagonist”. This becomes very evident the more you learn about this type of person. These types of people have an overarching sense of purpose for their life, and it is often for the good of people at large, and to be the best person that they can be. An INFP and ENFP relationship allows the couple to bond over this shared value. Doing the right thing is in their nature because they have the backing of their values and an ideal lifestyle. This can be an attractive quality for their partner in an INFP and ENFP relationship. These are the type of people to speak up for what they believe in. They would rather risk the social agony of someone disagreeing with them than sit idly by and let a perceived injustice go ignored. These kinds of people have an innate sense to intuit what others are feeling, even if they are not aware of it on the surface. This trait can be of great benefit in an ENFJ INFP relationship. It can just be an almost supernatural power and can often lead them to being great communicators in an INFP ENFP relationship. If you are able to understand how someone is feeling, you will know just what they want to hear and how they want information relayed to them. Due to this superpower, society should be grateful that this type of person tends to want the best for the world. The world of someone in an INFP and ENFP relationship is sometimes right at home, so they will do all they can to see that the relationship fulfills its greatest potential. They will use these powers to see that everyone they interact with comes out better after having spoken with them, and they are no different when maneuvering their ENFJ INFP relationship. ENFJ’s have many qualities that you would associate with the ideal politician. This person knows how to lead a room and does it with empathy for the people they are leading. One famous ENFJ politician is former US President Barack Obama. If you watch clips of Obama speaking one on one with someone, he has a distinct way of making people feel as though they are the only person in the world. Unfortunately, we do not know how Obama would bode in an ENFJ INFP relationship, because Michelle Obama has been characterized as an INTJ. This type of attention and supreme consideration for the other person can be infectious to the point of them wanting to spread the love to others. Some words used to describe ENFJ’s are warm, empathetic, responsive, and responsible. They make great managers, leaders, coaches, and public speakers, but also allows them to thrive in an INFP and ENFP relationship. If at some point you felt truly heard and understood by a charismatic person, chances are they may have been an ENFJ. Possibly the most famous ENFJ is Martin Luther King Jr. If you have an idea of what that man may have been like, he is a great starting framework for conceptualizing the ENFJ character type.

General Characteristics of INFP’s

To sum up INFP’s into one word, the general consensus is “mediator”.  Since such a large portion of dating is coming to a common ground, having a mediator in the pair can do wonders in an ENFJ INFP relationship. INFP's have a strong sense of creativity and can lead them to have an inclination towards art, music, or any sort of unique path that allows them to invite creativity into their everyday life. This uniqueness can be cause for a lot loneliness, however. Especially given how much value they typically place in close knit relationships. Being in and INFP and ENFP relationship can be a good source of solace for INFP's. They tend to feel invisible and unappreciated in a world that values vibrant personalities and extroverts in general. They have the supreme gift of empathy and strive to get the best out of each person they interact with, including their partner in their INFP and ENFP relationship. INFP’s uphold their values and wish to lead a life that is congruent to what they feel is important in life. They are loyal to the people they care about as much as the ideas that they hold true. They are flexible in their lifestyle as long as it stays within the confines of what they know to be true. INFP's are lucky when they find an INFP and ENFP relationship, because it often does align with their values. They will help others succeed in any way they can because they get joy from helping others reach their potential, which attracts the ENFJ in the ENFJ INFP relationship. They are feelers and lovers. Some famous INFP’s include Princess Diana, Audrey Hepburn, Fred Rogers, and John Lennon. These people had their unique ways of being in the limelight, which I think speaks to their introverted nature while carrying the burden of fame. Fun fact, Isabel Briggs Meyers, the founder of the Meyer-Briggs test was an INFP. muslim woman having a chat with man

Why do ENFJ INFP relationships work so well?

Let's dig a bit deeper into why people say that ENFJ and INFP relationships have such great potential to be compatible. It really boils down to two characteristics between the two types: the mutual shared qualities and the balancing out between the contrasting qualities. Let’s start with what the two types have in common. Two of the primary shared attributes are their values and their care for others. Both ENFJ and INFP relationships have strong moral codes and will stand up for what they believe in. Because one is extroverted and one is introverted, they may go about it in two totally different ways, but at the end of the day they are both attracted to the beliefs that they both hold dear to their hearts. In the same vein, if we notice the third letter in both groups, (F), an INFP and ENFP relationship will make decisions largely based on feelings. This is where they both get their love for people. Again, they may conduct their ENFJ INFP relationships with the people they care about in contrasting fashions, but they both feel deep in their hearts a connection to others and wanting the best for the world, and in turn, wanting the best for each other. While these two features remain consistent between the two in an INFP and ENFP relationship, the parts that differ amongst them are just as important. A lot of introverts might struggle with sticking to plans with others or taking the time to maintain healthy relationships. The extrovert in the pair won’t stand for any of that. While they may complain at first, introverts are often glad that their partner will make them socialize because when it comes down to it, they know they need to, and they will ultimately be glad for their INFP and ENFP relationship. On the flip side, ENFJ’s largely enjoy structure in their lives, and can be a bit more stoic. Once you get rooted in your habits, it can be daunting or almost frightening to deviate from the lane you’ve chosen. That’s where their free-wielding, flexible partner comes into play. The INFP in the pair feels suffocated with too much structure in their life and can push the ENFJ to “live a little” or maybe just take a break from the monotony of an ENFJ INFP relationship. When done in a beautiful balancing act, this can add up to added benefit for both parties and result in a loving ENFJ INFP relationship. As far as an emotional connection between the two types, there is typically a mutual understanding because of the shared intuitive nature of the ENFJ INFP relationship. Both can feel their way through to the way in which the other person is feeling and begin to garner a deep emotional connection. If the values and beliefs align, the vibrational frequency in an ENFJ INFP relationship is often a match as well. At the core of each type’s desires lies a true eagerness for the best for the other person. When both parties are coming from a place of love and good faith, that is often a recipe for a healthy ENFJ INFP relationship. This makes it easier to deal with the compromises one may have to make when going through life in an INFP and ENFP relationship. Although ENFJ’s would be implied as the more outgoing and the more talkative of the two, that is not always the case, especially when dealing with more dire matters. In serious conversations about the ENFJ INFP relationship, the Feeling portion of the ENFJ regularly overtakes the Extroverted portion of their demeanor. They are happy to listen to the INFP express themselves and then take in the information in their intuitive manner. This works well for the INFP and ENFP relationship, because for INFPs expressing themselves is a favorite activity of theirs, but because of their more reserved nature, this practice may be limited to only those who are closest to them and feel they can let their guard down. The relief of having someone to confide in that they can trust is a great marker of how secure they feel in the ENFJ INFP relationship.  Another component that is common among ENFJ and INFP relationships is the strive for personal development. The pairing of the INFP’s creativity and the ENFJ’s enthusiasm can yield some interesting and effective results. ENFJ’s have an innate desire to excel in all that they do. This becomes an attractive quality to the INFP who seeks to improve themselves through an ENFJ INFP relationship. INFP ENFJ relationships can often lead to some "off the beaten path" type of self improvement. They will take things that they have learned from self help books, media, and general life experiences and then they will curate a routine that works the best results in their INFP and ENFP relationship. These types of people welcome a challenge and are proud to know that their partner is challenging themselves to be the best that they can be. A mutual dislike of both parties in an ENFJ INFP relationship is the feeling that someone is being disingenuous. Because both types of people strive to be the best version of themselves and uphold deeply rooted values, when someone comes across as fake, phony, or generally not true to themselves, this can be off-putting to someone who believes in themselves so wholeheartedly. This can either act as a bonding mechanism between the two in the ENFJ INFP relationship, but on a broader scale, it can also allow them to sift through people in their lives and pick and choose who is worth having around. 

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