Porn can be a great way to escape reality. It has helped many people explore their deepest desires within the safety of their homes because, for many years, it’s been a solo activity. We only enjoy it behind closed doors, but did you know watching porn for couples can strengthen sexual satisfaction in relationships?
In a recent study, only 3.2% of couples reported that they often watch porn together, while a whopping 56.7% said that they do not watch porn for couples. Only 40.1% sometimes watch porn together. Why is that?
Traditionally, viewing pornography has been something to be ashamed of – you don’t talk about it even if you watch it and enjoy it. Back in the day, you’d have to find a movie theatre playing dirty movies or go to the store to rent one behind a secret curtain. It was taboo and not celebrated. Instead, you hid it away from prying eyes lest you develop a reputation for being a pervert or a porn addict.
Flash forward decades later, that shame persists, and it’s especially true when it comes to watching porn while in a relationship or as a married couple. People suggested that porn harms relationships, but it doesn’t have to if enjoyed responsibly. Watching porn for couples can be a great bonding experience, helping you try new things and explore a long-held sexual fantasy.
After you’ve had the sometimes awkward conversation about introducing porn into your relationship, here’s everything you need to know to enjoy porn for couples responsibly to get the most pleasure.
Is Watching Porn for Couples Good for Relationships?
A new study suggests that watching porn for couples is a good indicator of a healthy relationship. The couples who watch adult movies together tend to be more satisfied with their partners both romantically and sexually. They are happier because they can express their true selves. These findings directly contradict previous studies that suggested that porn harms relationships.
Each relationship is different, so you’ll want to explore your boundaries. The fact of the matter is that most people watch porn. Forty million Americans visit porn sites regularly, but only about one-third of those viewers are women. The adult film industry isn’t going anywhere with such high demand, so if you can’t beat them, why don’t you join them?
If porn becomes a problem in your relationship, reconsider your viewing habits. If it becomes serious, you and your partner can seek treatment for sex addiction. As long as you and your partner keep an open and honest communication pattern and understand that what’s on the screen doesn’t always translate to reality, watching porn for couples can be a healthy and fun way to spice up the bedroom. You’ll get new inspiration from every frame.
Benefits of Porn for Couples
Porn for couples can be a fun and exciting way to explore new things in your relationship, spicing things up in the bedroom with new positions, sex toys, and more. It can even help you decide if adding another partner to your activities is on the table. There’s something for everyone to enjoy. Let’s look at some of the reasons you should be watching porn together and some of the benefits it can add to your relationship.
Brings You Closer
People thought porn drove couples away from each other for so many years. After all, you’re watching other people have sex. Outside of actually cheating on your partner, what’s a more intimate moment? Get that out of your mind. That idea is so 1970s. Now, porn can help bring you together and provide a deeper intimacy in your long-term relationship.
So often, our interests bring us in different directions every day. We work. We take care of kids or animals. We rush until we’re so tired there’s no time for you and your partner, and your sex life suffers. Watching porn can be a shared activity based on mutual interests that bond you together sexually and help increase your sexual arousal. Especially if you’re short on time, it can jump-start the libido and help you on your way to getting off quicker.
It’s a great way to be open about sexual attraction. Just because you are sexually attracted to another person does not impact the appeal or love you feel towards your partner. Our body’s responses are entirely normal and natural, and porn for couples can be a healthy way that you can express them together.
Ultimately, increased intimacy strengthens relationships. Moments of vulnerability, including watching porn for couples, will bind you closer together with a shared experience unique to you and your relationship. It’s nothing to feel shame over. Celebrate your sexual desires and act them out together. Use it as a moment to satisfy your body’s needs together.
Improves Communication
Most families didn’t talk about sex. You learned the basics of sex ed, but you never learned how to discuss your needs or sexual desire. Watching porn together provides a safe space to do just that. Over time, the barriers and insecurities you’ve built will fade away as you lovingly explore your bodies together and act out what you see on the screen.
If you see something at the moment that you want to try, share it with your partner. Is it a new position? Do you want to introduce a toy in the bedroom, but you’ve always been too scared to ask? Watching porn for couples will give you a great excuse to bring it up, especially if carried away at the moment. It’s much easier to discuss after you see it play out successfully on the screen than out of the blue.
Be clear with your boundaries. If some specific scenarios or activities are off the table for any reason, share that with your partner before you start watching together lest porn for couples becomes a turn-off. It’s just as important to share what you don’t want with your partner to share what you do. Open communication goes both ways.
Inspiration for More Fun
Mainstream porn is entertainment. It’s not real life, but that doesn’t mean that art can’t inspire reality. When watching porn with your partner, pick scenes or positions to re-enact with your partner. It will be hot and fun, especially if you’re acting along with what’s on the screen. Your sounds of pleasure will blend, creating an irresistible soundtrack to activities, and you’ll be having better sex in no time.
Now, there are some essential things to keep in mind. They stage porn. It looks good on camera, so some positions, while they may look incredibly hot on the screen, don’t translate well to real life. That’s completely normal. Accept it and move on. Get creative. Use a sex toy or different positioning to make it work. It’s up to you to get it to the finish line during your sexual activity.
These moments build trust between you and your partner because you’re vulnerable enough to try new things. Have fun! If you sit and take notes during the porn, you’ll take the pleasure out of it. Instead, observe. Notice what turns your partner on and either act at the moment or take it back to the bedroom.
If they have a naughty secretary fantasy, dress up to make it happen. Porn for couples should help increase your sexual stimulation, express your most intimate desires and fantasies, and give you an outlet to finally express them to achieve sexual pleasure, once and for all. They will spice up even the most routine sex lives, breathing new energy into your relationship.
Downsides of Porn for Couples
While porn for couples can be incredibly arousing, it’s not always fun and games. In some cases, porn consumption can have adverse effects on your relationship, causing expensive additions, creating relationship issues, and establishing unrealistic expectations about sexual behavior and intimacy.
Let’s look at some of these downsides in more detail. Just because porn for couples can have adverse side effects in your relationship doesn’t mean it will. You can avoid these pitfalls by being open and honest with your partner, no matter how dirty your secrets are.
Develop Porn Addiction
Sex and porn addictions are severe issues and ones that can cause lasting harm to your relationships and your mental health. Here are some signs to watch for if you are worried you or your partner have a porn addiction.
You may feel like you can’t stop watching it. There’s always more, and you crave watching it, even when you’re out at home. You’ll find yourself down a rabbit hole, and hours and days have passed in the blink of an eye. Your interest in actual sex can wane, or you become more aggressive and demanding towards your partner. You may even find yourself going into debt over your addiction. Your porn habit has become a problem.
If you feel this way, you may have a pornography addiction, and the first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem and asking for help.
Promotes Unrealistic Expectations
Porn users can have unrealistic expectations of sex, especially if they watch a lot independently. It becomes even more true if they have watched copious amounts of porn before experiencing the act of sex themselves.
As seen in adult films, many men can feel entitled to sex and get angry immediately when they don’t get sex. On the flip side, your partner may feel pressured to live up to your set standards, which are not realistic.
Porn is not reality. It is art. That is a porn star who is very skilled at what they do, but sometimes those lines can get blurred. If this is the case, you may want to see a sex therapist. They can help you set realistic boundaries and uncover what may have caused you to create these expectations as a coping mechanism. If you’re willing to work on yourself, you can create a new reality. In the future, your relationships will have mutual love and respect instead of ownership and degradation.
No one is entitled to sex. It is not your right, and women and men do not exist to please you, despite what you may have learned on the internet.
Becomes a Sexual Crutch
If watching porn for couples is the only thing that turns you on, that’s a huge red flag. Porn for couples should be used as a sex aid, not as a crutch for forced intimacy. If it has become more and you have erectile dysfunction if you’re not watching porn, that’s a sign of deeper issues. Relationship experts can help you unpack what may be holding you back. It could be that you’ve drifted apart and lost sight of what binds you together as a couple, or it could be that you’re no longer attracted to each other.
Porn should never be the only thing holding your relationship together, and if it is, that could be a sign that you have an addiction. Remember, asking for help is not a sign of weakness, and if you’re both willing to work on your relationship, you will come out stronger on the other side, with or without porn for couples.
Porn and Cheating
Many people have viewed pornography use as cheating, and that’s not true. It may be a hard pill to swallow, but porn for couples can prevent cheating in some instances. If you or your partner believes they have needs that their current sexual relationship cannot meet, they will eventually want to seek satisfaction elsewhere.
However, porn for couples can help you or your partner express those sexual needs in a safe space – even if it’s just watching them together. That will give them the outlet they need to meet their needs respectfully. If your partner is inclined to cheat, no amount of porn for couples will stop that. However, if your partner feels sexually satisfied, valued, and heard, they may not start to seek that external validation they think they need.
Sexual attraction is natural, and it’s when you act on it physically and emotionally that it becomes cheating. Inherently, porn use is not bad or wrong unless you’ve promised your partner that you will not watch it.
How to Ask Your Partner to Watch Porn Together
Porn for couples can still be pretty taboo for some, so it may feel impossible to start the conversation. After all, what do you even say? The best way to start the discussion about porn for couples is to be direct.
Ask your partner if they would be interested in watching porn together. It doesn’t need to be in the bedroom as you’re doing the deed, but as a simple conversation over coffee. Start to talk about your relationship and ask if there’s anything they’d like to try. It could open the door to start the discussion about porn for couples.
And once you’ve decided on watching adult videos together, ease into it. There are so many categories, so it’s important to pick something you are both into sexually. Browse together and start a list! It can be a fun way to talk about what you’re interested in and open the door for creativity in the bedroom.
You’ll want to make sure that you’re paying attention to each other as you watch. Touch each other’s hair, get handsy and take make-out breaks. Please bring it back to each other and stay connected. Express things you’d like to try and re-enact at the moment.
Once you watch porn for couples, you can be as bold as you like. If you are trying more severe play, set a safe word, and stick to it. Porn for couples is only fun if you both are safe, consenting adults.
So is Watching Porn Good for Your Relationship?
Porn for couples can positively benefit relationships, strengthening intimacy while improving communication. It’s important to discuss what type of porn you want to watch, establish boundaries, and set realistic expectations before you start watching porn for couples. Remember, most porn is for the male gaze, so it’s not always practical. Still, that doesn’t mean you and your partner can’t still have fun with it as you try new things and explore each other’s bodies.
Now, each relationship is different, so you will want to talk to your partner before watching porn together. It may not be for everyone, but for those willing to take a step back, porn for couples can be a fun way to express yourself and your sexual desires with your partner in new and exciting ways.
